Spiritual teacher and philosopher, Gautama Buddha once said, “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” For self-love advocate, Armon Anderson, this statement most definitely holds true, as the life coach, relationship leader, and now celebrated author has dedicated himself to helping others uncover their self-worth. Releasing his book at a time where focusing on our mental health is a must, Anderson guides the masses along their journey towards self-love, and inspires others to manifest both a beautiful and fruitful future, by releasing their pains of the past, and simply allowing themselves to grow.
As a young boy growing up just outside Los Angeles, California, Anderson had always struggled with revealing his true sentiments. Living in a society where expressing raw emotion seemed unthinkable, Anderson spent most of his life afraid to open up, and his inability to process his feelings quickly led to an all time low. It wasn’t until his college years that things would suddenly change for the good. With only one semester left until Armon’s graduation, the young man was thankfully gifted with an extremely vivid dream, one that would not only change Anderson’s life and the relationship he had with himself, but one that allowed him to aid other individuals who struggled with self-love as well. Immediately accepting his new role as Mr. Self Love with open arms, Anderson has since helped thousands of people learn to be one with themselves.
In his debut book titled, Selflovology: Your Journey to Self-Love Starts Here, Anderson teaches the reader how to properly form a strong relationship with his or herself. Sharing many personal experiences and offering words of encouragement throughout, the book does so much more than solely teach one how to discover their self-worth but supplies them with the major blueprints for an overall transformation.
Eager to learn more about Mr. Self Love and the path towards healthy self-adoration, BELLA connected with Armon Anderson…
What was your moment of clarity that ultimately began this journey as Mr. Self Love?
My moment of clarity came during the tail end of a relationship where I had continued to choose, allow, and tolerate dysfunction simply due to believing I could be the answer to someones unhealed wounds.
Within that relationship, I ended up realizing that I was the common denominator. That if I had truly loved myself, I wouldn’t have ever tolerated the dysfunction that I did, for as long as I did.
Although difficult to process and understand, the moment of clarity became the biggest blessing of my life. Ultimately, I learned that we don’t get what we want or deserve in life, but rather, we attract the person we are first willing to become. The pain, and more importantly the growth, led me to my life’s purpose and becoming Mr. Self Love.
As someone who would end up changing paths and taking such a grand leap of faith, what advice would you give to someone looking to make such an imperative, yet scary change in their life as well?
What I found from taking big leaps of faith in my life was that it was more difficult trying to take a leap that I wasn’t in alignment with, than ultimately saying yes to my truth and taking a leap of faith in the direction of the life I knew I was meant to be living. Whether you do or don’t take the leap, most people will still never understand.
Your vision for where you desire to be is currently an image, or hologram if you will, and no one can see that but yourself. This is why it is vital that you replay that image every day and fuse that image with music so you get emotional about why you are taking that next big step in your life. The truth is, most people will not even spend five minutes a day listening to music while replaying the image created in their minds over and over again, but if you are willing to spend that time and replay the image you create, eventually what was in your mind will manifest itself in the physical world.
Remember to stay in alignment with who you really are, not who society, parents, or friends want you to be. Everything you’ve gone through has made you more of you really are, and now it’s time to share that with the world.
What do you feel is the first step in creating a healthy relationship with oneself?
The first step to creating a healthy relationship with yourself is truly accepting yourself. There is nothing you can do about the past so you must not allow the past to live rent-free in your mind. What can you do today that will enable you to become one percent better? Notice I did not say one hundred percent better? There’s a reason for that.
So often we want something that we believe is so far away, and because of that we never give ourselves the chance to even start. Instead, we don’t accept who we are and we dwell on how the past could’ve turned out different which would’ve led us to a different circumstance. Accept that where you are right now is where you are meant to be, and that one or two moments or events don’t equal a life sentence. You are in total control of your self-image, self-love, and where you decide to go from this moment forward.
How have you been maintaining a positive outlook/relationships throughout this global pandemic? What advice can you give to those who are struggling with their mental health and relationships?
The global pandemic really reminded me why I went on my own journey to self-love. In what was said to only last two weeks has lasted over one year now. Within seconds we lost human connection and the ability to connect like we always have. In-person events became Zoom video conferences, birthdays celebrated over FaceTime, and we were forced to accept a new normal.
When the pandemic first began, I don’t think anyone knew what to expect. A few weeks in, I realized that the old way of life wasn’t going to create the same internal happiness as the new way of life. It became extremely important to communicate with my fiancéwho is an ICU Nurse. We would go for walks while being on two different sides of the sidewalk, ensuring that we would be safe for ourselves and our loved ones. What used to be an everyday in-person interaction felt like a long-distance relationship, and we both understood that if we didn’t adapt to doing what we could given the situation, that our relationship wouldn’t continue to grow.
The advice I would give to someone struggling with their mental health or relationship through the pandemic would be to continue spending time doing what makes you happy and brings you joy. It might mean finding a new hobby, going for a drive, or a walk around the neighborhood. Also, it is important to share how you are feeling with someone you feel safe to confide in. Communication, although sometimes not the easiest thing to do when you’re in a tough place mentally, is ultimately the way through. By sharing with someone what is really going on, you will no longer feel alone, and you will be able to adopt a new perspective that you can apply to your life so you can move forward being your happiest and best self.
I always like to say, what we can’t do alone, we can do together. There is strength in numbers and there are people willing and ready to listen and support you, don’t hesitate to share your beautiful voice.
What do you wish above all that your readers take away from your book?
My hope is that when people read Selflovology, they will no longer feel alone and know that it is never too late to love themselves. I decided to be 100% vulnerable with my own story for that exact reason. I remember what my life looked and felt like when I felt alone and felt like there was no one to go to, or that I would be judged by someone if I really let them know what was going on in my life.
We are living in a social media digital age where when scrolling, it is easy to think most are living a life of perfection versus a life of progress. This can easily damage the way one feels about themselves, and prevent someone from sharing their truth as the standard and the bar is set to perfection, something no human being will ever achieve as we are all a work in progress, perfectly imperfect.
I titled the book Selflovology because I truly believe that out of all the things we study and learn, one of, if not the most important study, should be on ourselves since we do spend our entire lives with our thoughts and our physical bodies. Ultimately, I hope the takeaway leads to clarity, acceptance, self-love, and testimonials from people around the world having learned how they can practice self-love and continue bettering themselves and their lives.
To get your copy of Selflovology and begin your journey today, click HERE!
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